


A Good Man

by Nyxelestia



Series: Virtues, Chicken, and Destiny [1]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Season/Series 04
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-23
Updated: 2014-01-23
Packaged: 2018-01-09 17:45:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1148984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nyxelestia/pseuds/Nyxelestia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p></p><div class="center">
  <p> </p>
  <p>    <i><b>(</b>Sorrow<b>)</b></i><br/>  </p>
</div><br/>Merlin and Arthur have a moment before the Feast of Samhain. 'Missing scene' from episode 401: "The Darkest Hour". Prequel for the bulk of the 'Virtues, Chicken, and Destiny' series.
            </blockquote>





	A Good Man

**Author's Note:**

> Huge thank you to my beta, the wonderful [AngelQueen](http://archiveofourown.org/users/AngelQueen/pseuds/AngelQueen), who has patiently and wonderfully gone through my fics and turned them from a haphazard ball of word vomit into the fic posted here. ♥

~*~

Arthur sat across from his father and watched Merlin settle the king into the chair that looked out over the city. The sun was setting, and the fires of Samhain were being lit down in the city, the streets already filling with revelers hoping to meet the spirits of those lost to Morgana’s rage. Arthur would eventually go down there himself, and give the speech at the banquet intended for his father’s voice.

For now, he watched alongside his unseeing father, the occasional tune or scent drift up from the festivals below to punctuate their silence.

“It’s Samhain, Father,” Arthur said simply. His father didn’t acknowledge him, and Arthur wondered if Father wanted Mother back, tonight. Arthur certainly did.

Almost as much as he wanted his father back.

~*~

Later, much later, Arthur stood by the window in his room, looking down at the festival underway in the city. The sun had long set and the moon at the top of the sky was barely more than a sliver, but the city was still nearly as bright as day with all the bonfires.

There were many dead to pay respects to this year.

“Arthur?”

He sighed and turned away, standing upright to let Merlin settle his ceremonial cloak around him.

“All set,” Merlin said, standing back with a satisfied smile.

“How do I look?” Arthur asked, checking himself one last time.

“Passable.”

“Only passable?”

“Well, the clothes can only distract so much from your big ugly face ‒”

Arthur laughed as he swatted at Merlin. Merlin dodged with a smirk and started gathering up the laundry. He watched Merlin putter about, the small spark from their banter already fading into the chill of the night and the impending banquet. With his knights and Guinevere at the lower tables, only Merlin would be with him tonight – and even then, he would be behind Arthur, rather than at his side.

Court politics demanded solitude for Arthur… for now. The knights, Arthur’s knights, were not politically ambitious, and while Guinevere was not a noblewoman, she was active and leading and well-respected, taking well to her new position as chamberlain for the entire castle.

Arthur would have them all at his side where they belonged soon enough.

But for tonight, he was alone, save Merlin standing behind him.

Like he always was. No matter what Arthur said or didn’t say, did or didn’t do, Merlin remained by his side, or at least as close to Arthur as possible. All because he thought Arthur was a good man and one day would be a great king.

He still wondered where Merlin’s faith in him came from.

Arthur wasn’t sure he was the good man between them.

Once Merlin had bundled all the laundry together, they left Arthur’s chambers, heading down the corridor towards the junction where they would temporarily part ways.

“Good luck,” Merlin said as they went. “I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

“Provided you don’t get lost.” 

“That was once! Years ago!” Merlin protested with a smile, before they fell into a moment of comforting silence as they strode down the hall.

“Thank you,” Arthur said, struck by a moment of introspective sincerity. Must be the air of Samhain, or the smoke of the bonfires leaking into the castle. “For taking care of my father. For being my friend. Everything.”

Merlin’s smile became confused, but he nodded. “Um... you’re welcome?”

“You’re a good man, Merlin,” Arthur said.

Inexplicably, Merlin flinched, as though he’d been struck. He turned away from Arthur and clutched the laundry even tighter to his person. “Don’t,” he said hoarsely.

Arthur frowned, bewildered. “Don’t what?”

“Call me that.”

“A good man?” Arthur asked, confused. Merlin nodded. “Why ever not? You _are_.”

“I said _don’t_!” Merlin cried out, whirling to face him with something between fury and dismay on his face. “You have no right to call me that!”

“What are you... of course I do, I have every right. Why wouldn’t I?” Arthur demanded, trying and failing to corral the hurt confusion that came from Merlin’s words.

“Please, Arthur,” Merlin said, sounding ready to cry. “Just... don’t.”

“Merlin,” Arthur started, reaching over to lay an arm around Merlin’s shoulders, intending to pull Merlin into a hug he seemed to so desperately need. Instead, Merlin stiffened and pulled away.

“Please, Arthur, just don’t,” Merlin said, before walking away, down the smaller servants’ corridor towards the bowels of the castle, his tall figure inexplicably small as he hunched his shoulders and lowered his head.

Arthur stared at Merlin’s back until he couldn’t see his friend anymore, and then slowly turned towards the banquet.

He took his seat alone, and when Merlin finally arrived to the table, he was fully composed, not a trace of his true self on his face – neither his weary, saddened countenance from earlier, nor his normal cheery smiles and laughter he saved for just these feasts.

Instead, he bore a small, fake smile, and the man himself was cordial and professional. Words that should never be used to describe Merlin.

Arthur wanted his mother.

He wanted his father back.

But he needed Merlin.

~*~

**Author's Note:**

> More coming soon. In the meantime, please let me know what you think! :)


End file.
